I’ve been contemplating this post for quite a while because I keep bumping into people who ask about my blog and want to know why I write what I write. I’ve had people wonder if I’m in it to make money, or because I fancy myself a good writer (no, to both of those). And I’ve had people get offended that I openly talk about things on my blog that they think I should only talk about with people who are close (in real life) to me.

I’ll tell you first and foremost what drives me to blog, and then I’ll fill in a couple of gaps. You know how the internet is killing off print media and is even doing a number on tv and radio? Well, sure it’s because you can get your news faster and watch pirated videos easier and all that good stuff. But it’s also because for the first time ever, there’s an actual CONVERSATION taking place. People toss around the phrase “online community,” but it’s only as good as the people involved. And just like any community, there has to be give and take. So on a blog, the author puts thoughts out there and the readership responds.

This part is going to offend the lurkers on Verbal Intent, so I apologize in advance. But if you lurk on blogs, you’re basically reading the paper. And the paper is dying. The thing that keeps blogs alive is an active readership that is commenting, and posting, and cross-linking. And even if the readership of Verbal Intent chose to never do that, I would still blog. Because blogging (along with commenting on other blogs) is my way of contributing to the greater online community, something I think is important.

See I read tons of blogs (check out that blogroll on the right!), and throughout the years of reading these blogs I have learned a whole host of things. I learned how to program in PHP by reading blogs. I learned why I should just stick with V-neck shirts by reading blogs. I learned that I love wallpaper and I love that it’s coming back! All from blogs! I formulated many of my political opinions because of blogs. I learned how to get through a miscarriage by reading blogs and participating in communities. And if I don’t give back by commenting and by blogging in return, I am really sucking up the benefits of online community without doing anything to grow it. KINDA LIKE WHAT WE’RE DOING TO OUR NATURAL RESOURCES.

I’ve also benefited greatly from the specific “community” of Verbal Intent since I’ve been blogging. By being the first to open myself up to people who read this blog, I have seen my relationships with them blossom offline in a really cool way. I also got through a really tough loss last year in many ways because of how many of YOU came out of the woodwork to send me emails about your experience with loss and how you got through it. I’ve seen how we can mutually respect each other in that when I ask you to keep your negative opinions to yourself, you did. A whole host of you read that post and never remarked, so I thank you for keeping it to yourself that you think Penelope is a stripper name.

So that’s the “why”, but here’s the “in spite of.” Bloggers face a lot of criticism, even a very little fish in a big pond, as I am. So I have to have a tough shell, or as I often choose to do, only put myself out there when it’s something I’m confident in. Bloggers get a lot of unsolicited advice. But I have learned a lot from unsolicited advice, the biggest lesson being that you can go your own way. Bloggers have to put up boundaries. While it may seem that I’m willing to talk about anything on my blog, that is far from the truth. For instance, I don’t talk about my sex life, because I assume you don’t want to hear about how great Matt is in the sack. And I’ve never spoken about the work I do except in the most positive of lights, because I have some old bosses who read my blog. And straight up, there are still some subjects I call up my sisters or my BFF, Kiki, to discuss over the phone because it’s far too personal and I need their one on one advice. And of course there are many things that I’ll only discuss with Matt, because he’s all I’ll ever need.

I speak about people frequently, but if you haven’t caught onto it yet, if they’re not a celebrity, I will always make myself look like the bad guy. Obviously this isn’t the whole story. There are many many times when people near and dear to me do stupid, rude and mean things to me that really hurt. But this will never be a place for me to rat them out. It’s a place for me to rat me out.

And that brings me to my final point. Will I blog about my kids? Heck yes. Because it’s going to be a crazy new experience for me to be a mom, and I’m going to need help. But not only that, I’m going to be proud! And if they look anything like I did as a kid, they’re going to be flipping cute! But I’ll always use the same rule for my kids as I do for everyone else. I will always show myself to be the inept mom, as this is not a place to rat them out or embarass them.

Is this post as long or longer than a Grateful Dead song? Have I missed anything?

It’s been just shy of two years that I’ve been writing on Verbal Intent, and I thank you for coming along for the ride. I hope you stick around in the future because I really treasure the conversations we have together.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 6th, 2010 at 1:10 pm and is filed under Opinionatrix, The Idiotic Things I Do. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.