Hangin Out At The Public Pool
Since the weather has been in the 90s lately, we’ve been hitting our apartment complex’s public pool. Now before you go all “gonorrhea!” on me, I want to iterate to you the much higher cleanliness standards that seem to be popular in the South. People actually mow their lawns down here, and paint their houses, and eat off the toilets in public restrooms. Our pool reflects this standard, aside from the pee that I’m sure kids are releasing into the water. But c’mon, haven’t we ALL peed in a pool at least ONCE in our life? I KNOW I HAVE.
Although I’m a New Englander and love me some Cape Cod beaches, I’ve never embraced them as much as some other folks due to the fact that I grew up with an inground pool in my backyard. This kinda spoils you. You’re used to swimming in chlorinated water that only on occasion is home to a dead frog. Things like getting seaweed tangled around your legs and cutting your feet on clam shells are very foreign to the pool swimmer. So as happy as I might be spending the day with sand in my unmentionables and saltwater dried to my brow, I’d almost always opt for a clean, quiet and private pool setting.
Well our pool here is one out of the three. While you’re always guaranteed that it’s tidy, you’re also guaranteed to hear country music blaring on someone’s boom-box (is there any other decade-appropriate term for this?). While the South is known for beautiful women who wear lots of makeup and are well-bronzed, they still haven’t gotten the message that some people really SHOULD NOT be wearing bikinis. So we get a few of those as well.
Because we’re becoming regulars, we’re starting to recognize the other regulars. They gawk at me because I’m pasty white and almost fully clothed, and I gawk at them because of their tasteless Confederate flag tattoos. But once you jump into the water, you’re all washed of your many sins and can come together in a friendly game of pool volleyball.
I think there are worse ways to spend a hot afternoon.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:39 pm
this is probably a bizarre question, and please don’t be offended, but i’ve always wondered if it is worth it to have an inground pool in new england. was the heat of summer long enough to get good use out of a pool? i’ve always wondered this when flying over new hampshire and being surprised by the number of pools…
July 15th, 2009 at 2:40 pm
big ma would like to remind the writer that urine is sterile. no threat to happy pool swimming. in fact, big ma has it on good authority that a little pee on athlete’s foot will clear it right up. oh the wonders of the human body.
July 15th, 2009 at 3:06 pm
big ma, i will advise matt to use that solution for his athlete’s foot. thank you for advising us.
amy, that is a GREAT question. i have often wondered it myself, and i think if you asked my parents they would give a resounding “NO!” it’s been really expensive for them to keep up, and aside from the years when we were little kids and spent, literally, every day in the pool during the summer, they don’t get much use out of it.
personally, i don’t think it gets hot enough to have one, but at the same time, people there are used to swimming in cold weather in cold water so…