The little white ass

Another gift from my grandmother, this little white ass is carved out of quartz or some other rocklike substance that I’m unfamiliar with. She got it on a trip to Africa where she and my grandfather went on safari, one of my lifelong dreams. I love it not only because it feels like something that has always been around since my earliest memories, but also because every time I look at it, I’m reminded of my grandfather. I acquired my height, my moodiness, my love of animals, and my disdain for high taxes from him. When I was a little kid, I’d go over to their house and swoon over their pet goats, Cedric and Audrey. Goats were just about as big as he ever went in pets, but he always talked about wanting to have a pet ass. I think mostly so he could say the word over and over again.

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